a little bit of me

i dont know whats going on with me anymore?
ive been feeling so tired lately.
i sleep in way too much.
i dont fall asleep till 3.

im getting worried.

i feel as if i have nothing to look forward to.
i have no reason to wake up some mornings.

im so tired with my life. not in a suicidal way, but im tired of the life ive fallin into here in san jose. everything here is getting to me. i feel stressed, i feel anxious, i feel way to nostalgic.

i need to get away.

i was about to just drive on to the free way and see where it would take me, but then i remembered its mothers day so i just came back home.

something in san jose is draining me.
i dont know whats getting to me, i think everything is.

i got up at 11 today. i took my brother to work and came back and helped my mom clean the house.

i was suppose to clean my room. but instead i just got back into bed. ive just been laying here. doing nothing. its getting to me.

my parents asked me if im hungry like 5 times already. if i have to say no one more time im going to scream.

is it hard to be left alone? apparently in this house.

i dont know what it is but lately my parents and and some close friends have really been getting to me. like i cant stand them. im normally not like this.

maybe i blame san jose, because ive never felt like this before. maybe i blame this city because the fiends im so tired of are from here.

im not blaming the city exactly, more like what its doing to me. what something is doing to me here.

i was suppose to have started school in april, but because some dumb chick mest up i missed a week of school so now i have to wait till august.

jeeeeeeez.

i could not hate a place more then how much i hate this place.
i cant stand feeling this way.

i really need to snap out of it.

again...i need something new. i need an escape.
i need me back. ive been through so much and fought so hard for me back. i dont wanna lose it again.

i wanna go for a walk. i wanna go feed the ducks across the street. i wanna sit in the grass or climb a tree.

well it is mothers day, i hope you all can celebrate it the best way possible. in mexico it was yesterday so i did my mothers day celebrations ayer. i gave my mom her card and present i talked to my aunts and grandma.

<3 bye